1st Floor, Going Up!

Tonight my friends and I were sharing our frustrations of elevator mannerisms here. We'll just say that there's certain habits among the people here when riding on an elevator, though I'll just expound upon the main two: the "Close Door" button, and "No Smoking." Despite the usual laid-back, nonchalant way of walking down the streets, the people here take their elevator rides oh-so-seriously. If you hesitate to get on when the doors open and there's a person already on, don't be surprised if they mash that little "Close door" button (multiple times) right before your very eyes and smile as the doors slide closed. I think we estimated that hitting this button every time the elevator stops to let someone on or off may actually save anyone else that may be on board a whopping 3-8 seconds (depending on which floor you live on)! Also, if you're riding the elevator and you happen to be jammed in with 15 other people and closest to all the buttons and you don't hit the button, you can expect to be glared at, and reached around. They WILL hit the button no matter what. It's kind of like the beginning of Season 2 of Lost, where the world would cease if the numbers weren't entered in every few minutes. Like the time saved on the elevator will make up for all the time it will take for them to walk from the elevator out of the building or to their apartment door. Ha. Anyways, Close Door Nazis...it's true. On to the second elevator phenomenon: the elevators clearly display "No Smoking" signs on the wall above the buttons, but this doesn't stop the folks that live here, no sir-ree. They think that "No Smoking" means to actually just not literally smoke the cigarette while inside. BUT it's perfectly ok to have a lit cigarette in there, so long as you hold it down below your waist, because this prevents everyone else from having to inhale your secondhand smoke completely. What!? Please note the sarcasm in the last statement. If I get lung cancer, I'm blaming it on the men of East Asia. No wonder our air here is polluted, 8 out of 10 men here smoke (according to the statistics calculated by my estimation). It's like little chimneys pouring out gaseous smog as they burn their little tobacco fuel hour by hour. So anyways, you plan on coming over here, just be prepared for the elevator situations!